The Melting Pot
Amalgamation of Thoughts…

A Perfect Day

June 5th 2009 in Random

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You get up on a Monday morning.. You brush your teeth, get ready, put on some good music while blow drying your hair – setting it the perfect way, wear your favourite pair of jeans and enjoy scrambled eggs! You humm along the music.. Dancing your way to the kitchen,  you kiss your mum goodbye and there you are – heading out towards the bus stop! You glance at your watch, ohh.. plenty-a-time! Your fish out your ear phones from your satchel and walk towards the stop.. Hmm… Seems to be a good day – nice and bright (maybe you’ll get to see the cute guy from the neighbourhood.. ). Here comes the bus, you get in with the rest of the people.. Bryan Adams saves you from the hustle of the crowd around. The conductor comes, you pay for the ticket and look out the window, nodding your head to the beat of the music… There’s something between your legs. A hand, pressing into the inner part of your thighs.. You suddenly turn around, and with a jerk you push past people  to the front of the bus, your heart hammering in your chest. You’ll get down at the next stop. What the fuck. There is a disgusting sensation under the zipper of your favourite jeans.. You take deep breaths, disgust combined in equal proportions with nausea washing over your body. You wait impatiently for the bus to stop, the music just a blur in your ears now.

Tears start to prickle at the back of your eyes… and you peer outta the window, blinking rapidly, to avoid eye contact with anyone.. Finally, the bus stops. You get out, sobs racking your body. You want to go back home, but you got an important lecture that you can’t miss. You hail an auto, and head to college.

This post is a tribute to eve-teasers and sexual abusers. Now you know how we feel.



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17 comments to...
“A Perfect Day”
    Avatar
    Divya

    Yes. And its not always about strength. You report these things to people later, most of them will say that oh! why didn’t you slap them back, or create a chaos. But, in most situations this is NOT possible. And all the guys who are vocal about eve-teasing, to you, its not about being weak or timid. Do you know of cases where when girls reacted to eve-teasing, they were thrown acid at and similar shit. Not to mean that one tolerates, but rather positions oneself in a way where eve teasing is least possible. I travel in public transport often, figure out the ‘safest’ places to sit or stand etc., and if I sense that there can be trouble, in a slightly louder tone, tell the person to get a side. That’s one thing all girls should know. Instead of abusing loudly, a loud ‘side ho jao bhaiya’ works way more. Clothes to are no more even an issue of contention. Even when one is fully clothed from top to toe, these bastards will not control their itch.
    Your second last paragraph has immense stance. and it feels exactly like this, and worse. Especially when your freedom is curtailed and touched w/o choice. These are our bodies damn it, not your territory.


    Reply
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    Sonia Chauhan

    Very well said, Divya. This is how it feels. But the sad part is, I don’t think any eve-teasers are gonna read it..


    Reply
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    silhouette

    Divya, I couldn’t agree more.. Indian scenario today leaves women helpless.
    Sonia, I know but I sure hope that happens someday! That is why its out here for everyone to read..


    Reply
    Avatar
    Rahul

    The mentality of men in the so-called “progressive” parts of the nation like Delhi is something to be ashamed of. According to them, every woman on the road, on a bus, in the metro is their private property. I remember travelling in a DTC bus a while back. A woman was sitting and a man stood next to her, falling on her, staring down her cleavage. When she showed some signs of protest, she was snubbed. The best part is the people don’t care. If a woman wears a sleeveless, it’s her fault. If she ventures out at night, the blame is on her. When will the men be held accountable for their actions?

    The women must endure this each day. Little girls are not spared. These are frustrated souls. There is something wrong with the society at large because the problem just seems to grow out of hand as each day passes.


    Reply
    Avatar
    silhouette

    First of all, thank you for your participation..

    This extract is just an insight into the psyche of men and women. It is not intended to demean anyone, nor am I being judgemental towards the weaker sex. It is an attempt to look beyond closed doors, and reach out to the fear that lurks in a girl’s eyes..

    An attempt. Thats all it is.


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      Avatar
      Rahul

      A very fine attempt is all I can say. You left it to us to figure out exactly what you wanted to say. Each one can have a different interpretation for it. But at the core lies one fact – it cannot be justified in any way.


      Reply
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    Sahil

    thats so truly written divi and rahul… the plight that women face due to these eve-teasers is really a pathetic side of the world we are living in…


    Reply
      Avatar
      Rahul

      You’re right, Sahil. The author has captured the emotions well and presented them in a way that pinches even the most heartless. It’s time men realise this could happen to their own daughters, wives etc.


      Reply
    Avatar
    Varun Vasisht

    Great work…..


    Reply
    Avatar
    Divya

    I think, the idea underlying the author’s article is more than provocation. Or maybe more than a ‘well-written’ comment. The point is what action we all are willing to take. Both as men and women, how much ready are we to protect ourselves and protect others!?
    And Sahil, thanks for dropping by. I want you to join soon.


    Reply
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    Divya

    Sonia and Silhouette- We are helpless but not hopeless. We have to make a move, however minuscule. And being here and participating is the first step we people have already taken. Proud of you. :)


    Reply
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    manushee

    i have been using public transport since years and not only such incidents ….but even the gestures sometimes make you vomit right on their faces…i remember i used to carry safety pins in the bus and the moment smone tried to drop himself on me i would just poke it in…one more incident was when i had saved one of the girls on an empty bus…when there were just 4 men and the conductor…i remembered how scared the girl was….and the worst part was that she was only 11 or 12…i really dont know whats the solution to this problem but maybe in India this will always be an issue unless girls train themselves in self defence.


    Reply
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    Rahul

    Manushee, I think you forgot the biggest point – THE MEN HAVE TO CHANGE. Women may go out, they may train themselves but until the mentality of the Indian male changes, everything is useless. The change may be brought about by the way you suggested – self defence and an absolute no-tolerance policy for such offenders. Some laws should be borrowed from Saudi Arabia and UAE if I may suggest.


    Reply
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    silhouette

    The underlying idea behind this post was to make it clear to everyone here that,

    Men have got to change. Rahul, you are absolutely right. This is the only option.

    Learning self-defence, strict laws is as good as blah blah when ultimately you cannot change their filthy attitudes.

    The motives and intentions have to be cleaned up. Some serious work needs to be done.

    Maybe by making them realise what women go through…


    Reply
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    manushim

    @rahul and silhouette yes men’s attitute has to change but in a country like India where you have such a vast range of classes of people around, the question is how practical this solution is? HOW can you change a man’s perception…by punishment? yes maybe but for how long? i seriously feel that its very easy to say that men’s perceptions have to change but is it possible? ’cause half of the punishment givers/ policemen are ‘men’ who are as corrupt as the general public…. in that case HOW is this a practical solution?


    Reply
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    Rahul

    The system needs an overhaul. First of all, the frustrated kids need to be given sex-ed. The shitty soaps which portray women as simply defenseless behanjis cooking meals need to be banned. The parents have got to learn to allow their children to interact with the opposite sex. The Indian male is a deeply, sexually frustrated specie. It is probably the biggest factor that causes them to commit such acts. The second factor is that they have been made to believe for generations that “smart, outgoing” women are characterless and it is the duty of a man to change the situation, no matter what it takes (not that they would spare a more reserved female as well). Thirdly, they know that they WILL get away with such crimes because of the second factor that I stated… the blame in the end would be put on the female for exciting the male. The men in our country need to know that if they mess with the females, the hammer in the court will not fall on the judge’s table but on their testicles. Education and awareness is what is required.


    Reply
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    Silhouette

    I agree, Rahul. A more precise definition of the India Men Mentality can’t be phrased. Allowing children to interact with opposite sex and sex-ed is all fine but this whole thing of seeing the fairer sex as the ‘weaker sex’ has given men an edge which has been perverted and abused by them in a variety of ways. Just because they are physically stronger, they feel they are a blessing to the society and that they should be admired and obeyed at all times.
    And the credit goes to the great Indian scriptures… One look into the life of Draupadi, Shakuntala, Sita….
    why, they are the shining beacons of ‘ABLA NAARIS’! what about that…?


    Reply

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