Troubled
If you tell me that I am the most important person in your life, I would believe it. Now, there are people who would never believe it but I am the other category. I would believe. The consequence would be that I would expect you to treat me like the most important person in your world. And when that doesn’t happen, i.e. when I am not treated like the most important person of your world, I would be disappointed in you. I would be disappointed over the fact that I didn’t get the attention, the responses, the time that I would like to have and share with you. I would want you to treat me in a certain way, look at me in a certain way. And the most important thing, I would make you my escape. I would expect you to save me from the world. You could be my knight in shining armour, battling the world for me. You would be the factor of stability in my haphazard life. I would want you to support me. Give me good advice.
But you aren’t there. You are not responding the way I expected. You told me you would be there, you told me so. And you are just the way you always were. This is the way you are.. This is how you have always been. To everybody else. But then what about my expectations? Is it correct to expect you to change your life for me? You may feel it in your heart but not able to bring it to your lips. Does that mean that I am not important for you? Is it necessary that an important person should be treated like the most important person. And if not, then why all this crap about being the most important person? If you feel it, there’s no need to say it? But if you don’t say it, what’s the point in feeling it?
And what if I am a troubled person. What if then, you raised my expectations and went away? What am I supposed to do then? Or what if you do mean it, but don’t show it. Am I supposed to be disappointing? Or hope that one day, you will say something and the world will be better again? Or should I look for someone who is just the way I want it? Is it possible to find a person who is programmed to suit my needs.
I am a little confused here..
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“Troubled”